To be constantly fighting.. physically and spiritually..
I don't even know whether I'm fighting for You.. or against You..
If it is for You, give me orders.. I'm waiting for the moment to strike!
But if the fight is against You, please defeat me already..
How can I battle His own creations in this society and world.. why can't I claim small victories.. why are there rules and boundaries during the fight.. and why are there so many unanswered questions..
Maybe.. maybe I should fight myself to begin with.. maybe I have to put myself on the research desk and examine myself.. Am I worthy to fight.. and who do I fight for..
I know I was chosen to fight because He threw an arrow and a shield to me.. a message and His Word.. enough reason to start the battle..
But before I can win.. I must sharpen my skills, build up my strength and stand up..
Only then I can move on each time.
Then finally.. let me fight under Your command and lead me to victory..
